Animals are WEIRD...

Started by Grammy, April 22, 2021, 06:06:28 AM

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Grammy



This is Chester.  Ever since the last election, he's been in a funk.  He just sits and stares at nothing.  Except when you pat him on the end of his spine.  When you do that, he closes his eyes and starts bobbing his head back and forth, like Stevie Wonder.  He's weird.

Yesterday, I drove through the corn fields and pastures to get to the post office.  I saw one of the farmers had two new horses.  They were in a 5-acre beautiful field, full of new green grass.  But they were both crammed all the way into the front corner of the fence, up against the side of the road, with their heads pushed the wire, trying to get the grass in the ditch.  Tell me animals aren't weird.

While I was driving along, I felt as if I was in a video game.  The object of the game was to avoid hitting all the birds who, rather than fly in the big open sky, would rather fly right in front of my car.  Because they're weird.

Then there were the doves who came out of the ditch and walked across the road in front of me.  I had to stop and wait for them.  They made me remember when we had another place out in the country many years ago.  There was a fountain in the front yard.  Every evening, like clockwork, these two doves would come flying down the road as if it was a landing strip, then drop down at the end of the driveway.  Then they would walk, side by side, up the driveway, to the fountain.  When they were done eating and drinking and bathing, they would stroll back down the driveway, all the way to the road, then adjust their rudders and lift off.  Because they were weird.

We had llamas on that farm.  I remember hearing a girl screaming one day and rushing out to see what was going on.  What was going on was that Packer, the big male, was chasing Little Bit, also a male, round and round the pasture and Little Bit was screaming, like some girl in Texas Chainsaw Massacre.  Once the chase was over, Little Bit would come trotting by Packer, and inch closer and closer until Packer began chasing him again and the screaming started all over again.  My neighbor said my llamas were gay.  But they were just weird.

So now, I'm sitting here, watching the squirrels on the bird feeder.  I dumped plenty of food on the ground; it's all there for the taking.  But no.  They would rather leap up from the ground, grab hold of the feeder, spin around and get slung off into orbit.  Then do it again.  Because squirrels are weird.

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Solars Toy

Love your descriptions....  Toy

I have the most trouble with squirrels and the occasional bunny.

Squirrels will wait on the side of the road and them make a dash across to the other side just as you get up to them.

There were several times I very slowly drove down the road (in the dark) with a bunny darting back and forth in front of the car.
I pray, not wish because I have a God not a Genie.

Solar

Quote from: Solars Toy on April 25, 2021, 10:14:20 AM
Love your descriptions....  Toy

I have the most trouble with squirrels and the occasional bunny.

Squirrels will wait on the side of the road and them make a dash across to the other side just as you get up to them.

There were several times I very slowly drove down the road (in the dark) with a bunny darting back and forth in front of the car.
Yeah, deer run in threes, the first two cross fine, the third waits till the last minute before the attack on your bumper or fender.
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Grammy

Quote from: Solars Toy on April 25, 2021, 10:14:20 AM
Love your descriptions....  Toy

I have the most trouble with squirrels and the occasional bunny.

Squirrels will wait on the side of the road and them make a dash across to the other side just as you get up to them.

There were several times I very slowly drove down the road (in the dark) with a bunny darting back and forth in front of the car.


Oh, we call those the "Geico Squirrels"!    :laugh:
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Solar

Quote from: IAmGrammy on April 25, 2021, 02:50:21 PM

Oh, we call those the "Geico Squirrels"!    :laugh:
I call em rats with antlers... :biggrin:
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Grammy

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