Best Christmas Joke I've Heard In a While

Started by tbone0106, January 04, 2012, 03:41:31 PM

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tbone0106

Three men -- a Michigander, an Ohio Buckeye, and a West Virginian -- were walking together down a two-lane highway on Christmas day when a semi went out of control and ran them all over, killing them all.


The group forthwith appeared at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter took a look at them and said, "Well, clearly you three didn't expect to be here today! My job is to welcome you into Heaven, but I must tell you that on this day of all days, we have a special requirement. Each of you must show me something you have in your possession that represents the Christmas spirit.


The Michigan man reached into his pants pocket and came up with a BIC lighter. He flicked his BIC and said to St. Peter, "It's like a candle on a Christmas tree or a menorah."


St. Peter considered for a few seconds, and agreed. "Yes, that's fine! Welcome to Heaven." And he opened the Gates and allowed the Michigan man to pass.


The Buckeye searched his pockets and came out with a ring of keys, which he jangled back and forth in front of St. Peter's face. "They're Christmas bells, jingle bells," he said.


"Oh, I see. Well, yes, that's good enough," St. Peter replied, and held the Gates open for the Ohio native.


The West Virginian had been scouring the pockets of his bib'alls the entire time, and just as St. Peter turned his way, he found the right thing in the bottom of one of his back pockets. He proudly waved a pair of lace panties in St. Peter's face.


With a frown, St. Peter said, "I'm not sure I see the Christmas connection to your item of women's underwear."


"Oh, you don't git it," said the hillbilly. "These is Carol's."

WoodBurner

If it was easy everyone would be do'in it.