I Swear to God, I Saw It on Craigslist!

Started by TboneAgain, February 26, 2015, 05:43:43 PM

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TboneAgain

For those of you who are fans of brutal reality, such as can be sampled at the various Walmart shopper photo websites, I offer up this little subsection of life.

Craigslist has about the same level of discretion and the same requirements for admission as Walmart. Therefore, the results are remarkably similar, when it comes to bizarre and nutty posts and pictures. I'm thinking we can share the very best (worst) of Craigslist here.

Enjoy!
The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States respectively, or to the people. -- Tenth Amendment to the US Constitution

Government is not reason; it is not eloquent; IT IS FORCE. -- George Washington

TboneAgain

Here's one I happened on today. I was checking the Columbus Craigslist site for "mowers" and happened across this thing:



What blew my mind was the text that went with the not-so-hot photo: "48 inch cut. Walk behind. Commercial grade. Starts every time and has new blades and tubes in tires. Also has a velke not in picture available also. Thanks, Nick" (Emphasis mine)

What the hell is a "velke?"  :confused:

Knowing a bit about such mowers, I understand that there is a small wheeled platform that can be attached to mowers like this for the purpose of allowing the operator to ride standing up, kinda-sorta, rather than walk. It's a fairly simple affair, a little trailer not unlike that spindly carriage pulled behind trotters at the harness races. In both cases it's called a sulky.

It's not called a "velke."

This one extends far beyond a mere typo into the realm of mind-numbing dumbness.

I thought about calling this nimrod and asking him if he'd sell just the "velke," separate from the mower. But I can't bring myself to piss away the cell minutes.

The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States respectively, or to the people. -- Tenth Amendment to the US Constitution

Government is not reason; it is not eloquent; IT IS FORCE. -- George Washington

walkstall

Quote from: TboneAgain on February 26, 2015, 06:01:38 PM
Here's one I happened on today. I was checking the Columbus Craigslist site for "mowers" and happened across this thing:



What blew my mind was the text that went with the not-so-hot photo: "48 inch cut. Walk behind. Commercial grade. Starts every time and has new blades and tubes in tires. Also has a velke not in picture available also. Thanks, Nick" (Emphasis mine)

What the hell is a "velke?"  :confused:

Knowing a bit about such mowers, I understand that there is a small wheeled platform that can be attached to mowers like this for the purpose of allowing the operator to ride standing up, kinda-sorta, rather than walk. It's a fairly simple affair, a little trailer not unlike that spindly carriage pulled behind trotters at the harness races. In both cases it's called a sulky.

It's not called a "velke."

This one extends far beyond a mere typo into the realm of mind-numbing dumbness.

I thought about calling this nimrod and asking him if he'd sell just the "velke," separate from the mower. But I can't bring myself to piss away the cell minutes.


What he has is call a Velke Sulky. 



A politician thinks of the next election. A statesman, of the next generation.- James Freeman Clarke

Always remember "Feelings Aren't Facts."

TboneAgain

Quote from: walkstall on February 26, 2015, 06:32:31 PM

What he has is call a Velke Sulky. 





Oh, stop. You quit it! There's really such a thing?

I guess it's a situation where those deeply and irretrievably in the inner workings of grass-cutting-dom know "velke" like we know "kleenex."

"Yeah, maybe it's a trade name, but it means everything to us!"

Out of unquenchable curiosity, Walks, I have to ask, how come you to know about velke?

Also, I hereby broadcast my unstinting apologies to the moron in Columbus trying to sell his mower which has a velke, or might have under the right circumstances. I'm sorry, you butthead, and I really mean that sincerely, I think.

Methinks you, Walks, may have stretched the bounds of the illimitable internet to find information on the velke line of products. God bless you, sir. It beats the shit out of me.
The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States respectively, or to the people. -- Tenth Amendment to the US Constitution

Government is not reason; it is not eloquent; IT IS FORCE. -- George Washington

walkstall

Quote from: TboneAgain on February 26, 2015, 07:15:31 PM
Oh, stop. You quit it! There's really such a thing?

I guess it's a situation where those deeply and irretrievably in the inner workings of grass-cutting-dom know "velke" like we know "kleenex."

"Yeah, maybe it's a trade name, but it means everything to us!"

Out of unquenchable curiosity, Walks, I have to ask, how come you to know about velke?

Also, I hereby broadcast my unstinting apologies to the moron in Columbus trying to sell his mower which has a velke, or might have under the right circumstances. I'm sorry, you butthead, and I really mean that sincerely, I think.

Methinks you, Walks, may have stretched the bounds of the illimitable internet to find information on the velke line of products. God bless you, sir. It beats the shit out of me.

:lol: For five years I did some voluntary work after I retired.  I cut 7 acres of grass with a lot of trees.  They worked great around trees, once the trees were done it was time for the big grass cutter.  The big grass cutter was something like this.

The one I used could do 25 to 30 mph. 

It helped me go from 10 & 15hr. day into retirement.  I was not thinking of retiring, but young people were getting laid off and they needed the job and I did not.  They said they would keep 4 people if I retire.  Talked it over with the wife, next day said get my papers in order.   :lol:
A politician thinks of the next election. A statesman, of the next generation.- James Freeman Clarke

Always remember "Feelings Aren't Facts."

Dr. Meh

I have an interesting Craigslist success story but it's cool, not funny.

My brother collects vintage video games. He lives in Montana and posted an ad saying he buys old games and such. He got a call from a lady who brought a box of games by his work so he can buy them. He glanced in the box and bought them for $40 while on his lunch break. He put them in his car and went back to work.

When he got home, he was going through them and at the bottom of the box was a Nintendo World Championship game! For those who don't know, that game is VERY rare and considered the holy grail of video games. He had it authenticated and kept it for a short while before deciding to sell it. He took pictures of himself with it so he can always remember that he had the pinnacle of rare video games. About a year ago, he sold it on ebay for over $10,000. Not bad for a $40 purchase from a stranger on Craigslist.

Mountainshield

Quote from: Dr. Meh on February 26, 2015, 08:41:46 PM
I have an interesting Craigslist success story but it's cool, not funny.

My brother collects vintage video games. He lives in Montana and posted an ad saying he buys old games and such. He got a call from a lady who brought a box of games by his work so he can buy them. He glanced in the box and bought them for $40 while on his lunch break. He put them in his car and went back to work.

When he got home, he was going through them and at the bottom of the box was a Nintendo World Championship game! For those who don't know, that game is VERY rare and considered the holy grail of video games. He had it authenticated and kept it for a short while before deciding to sell it. He took pictures of himself with it so he can always remember that he had the pinnacle of rare video games. About a year ago, he sold it on ebay for over $10,000. Not bad for a $40 purchase from a stranger on Craigslist.

My grandfather threw out our vintage consoles and computers with all the games over 25+ years of collecting from BBC micro too Nintend, sega and many I don't remember the names of. I felt sick to my stomach for weeks not thinking about the money, but the thought of never being able to play them again as I would never waste tens of thousand of dollars on buying it online. Nostalgia is good but geez what kind of an asshole spend 10k on that shit?

But we never told him that it was basically gold he had thrown out, it was our (me, my father and uncle) fault for leaving it taking up place at his house and never explaining that this is worth more than the original price. It was just old stupid video games taking up space to him   :tounge:

TboneAgain

I service and collect chainsaws, mainly as a hobby, but also as a supplemental income stream -- a little cash on the side, that is. They're rare, but killer deals on Craigslist can be phenomenal.

Several years ago, I spotted a listing offering two chainsaws and a gas line trimmer, all needing some work, for $10. I called the phone number and learned that the deal was ten bucks for ALL, not for each, so I headed to the address they gave me. When I pulled up to the curb at the house, there were two teenage boys on the front porch, one trying mightily to pull start one of the saws, and the other texting mightily on his iPhone. One saw was a little McCulloch two-cube trim saw that I later sold for $65. The second saw was a vintage 1972 Pioneer 3071, a four-cube beauty that I still own. And the weed whacker was a good, solid Homelite that runs like a champ to this day.

Another time a guy called me in response to a "broken chainsaws wanted" ad I had put on CL. I ended up buying 10 saws from that guy for $50. I sold one of them on eBay to a guy near Pittsburgh for a little over $300 plus freight (it was a Stihl 036 Pro, IIRC). Another one was a sweet little Echo CS315, vintage around 1973, which I still have and use as a trim saw. Over time, I probably cleared $400-500 parting out the rest of 'em.
The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States respectively, or to the people. -- Tenth Amendment to the US Constitution

Government is not reason; it is not eloquent; IT IS FORCE. -- George Washington