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Meet Melissa Lee Williams. The West Virginia woman, 41, is facing assault and weapons charges after allegedly waving a knife at two men who declined her demands to engage in sexual conduct at a motor inn.
The October 22 incident is detailed in an amusing/gross Jackson County Sheriff's Department report excerpted here.
According to investigators, Williams--who lives four doors down from her estranged husband at the 77 Motor Inn--showed up at his door and asked Danny Williams and another man to "eat my pussy." At this point, Williams, pictured in the mug shot at right, "commenced to undress herself," reported Deputy Ross Mellinger.
While Danny Williams "declined said invitation," the other man, Adam Watson, told cops that he "agreed to perform at her request." However, as Watson approached Williams, "he became overwhelmed by horrible vaginal odor emitting from Melissa Williams." Watson, understandably, "declined to proceed any further."
This is when Melissa Williams allegedly "produced a lock-back folding knife," opened it, and pointed the weapon at her estranged husband. She then reportedly uttered a line never before memorialized in a police report: "Somebody is going to eat my pussy or I'm going to cut your fucking throat."
NOVEMBER 16--The West Virginia woman who last month pulled a knife on two men and announced, "Somebody is going to eat my pussy or I'm going to cut your fucking throat," pleaded guilty today to assault and was sentenced to 90 days in jail.
During an appearance this morning in Jackson County Magistrate Court, Melissa Lee Williams, 41, also received a 90-day suspended sentence and was ordered to pay $185.80 in court costs, according to a plea form. Williams, pictured in the mug shot at left, is currently in custody at the South Central Regional Jail.
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/bizarre/malodorous-perp-gets-90-days-jail (http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/bizarre/malodorous-perp-gets-90-days-jail)
Quote from: Solar on November 24, 2010, 11:24:30 AM
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Meet Melissa Lee Williams. The West Virginia woman, 41, is facing assault and weapons charges after allegedly waving a knife at two men who declined her demands to engage in sexual conduct at a motor inn.
The October 22 incident is detailed in an amusing/gross Jackson County Sheriff's Department report excerpted here.
According to investigators, Williams--who lives four doors down from her estranged husband at the 77 Motor Inn--showed up at his door and asked Danny Williams and another man to "eat my pussy." At this point, Williams, pictured in the mug shot at right, "commenced to undress herself," reported Deputy Ross Mellinger.
While Danny Williams "declined said invitation," the other man, Adam Watson, told cops that he "agreed to perform at her request." However, as Watson approached Williams, "he became overwhelmed by horrible vaginal odor emitting from Melissa Williams." Watson, understandably, "declined to proceed any further."
This is when Melissa Williams allegedly "produced a lock-back folding knife," opened it, and pointed the weapon at her estranged husband. She then reportedly uttered a line never before memorialized in a police report: "Somebody is going to eat my pussy or I'm going to cut your fucking throat."
Doesn't this belong up in Survival tips along with the Tuna in oil Conspiracy :o
Quote from: REDWHITEBLUE2 on November 24, 2010, 01:50:23 PM
Doesn't this belong up in Survival tips along with the Tuna in oil Conspiracy :o
:D :D :D :D :D
I was going to post the link to your comment, but somehow I just knew you'd make the connection. :))
Quote from: Solar on November 24, 2010, 02:13:16 PM
:D :D :D :D :D
I was going to post the link to your comment, but somehow I just knew you'd make the connection. :))
Like I said
Perverted Great minds think alike :))
Quote from: REDWHITEBLUE2 on November 24, 2010, 02:18:51 PM
Like I said Perverted Great minds think alike :))
Somehow I think I might get complaints over this one.
So I'm going to blame it all on you. ;D
Quote from: Solar on November 24, 2010, 02:33:50 PM
Somehow I think I might get complaints over this one.
So I'm going to blame it all on you. ;D
Playing Liberal for a day again I see
Sure Throw me under the Bus :))
Quote from: REDWHITEBLUE2 on November 24, 2010, 03:07:08 PM
Playing Liberal for a day again I see
Sure Throw me under the Bus :))
Thump....Thump...Hey driver! What did we just run over? ::)
Love at a West Virginia truckers motel.... :o
Billy
I printed this one off to show to my neighbor, who hails from the great state of WV. He'll get a kick out of it. :P
Quote from: tbone0106 on December 12, 2010, 12:43:04 PM
I printed this one off to show to my neighbor, who hails from the great state of WV. He'll get a kick out of it. :P
I think we've all seen these women at least once in our lives.
Thankfully they're usually the defendant in the orange jumpsuit.
I don't know about that. They have an alarming tendency to show up at Walmart with about six kids in tow. And riding one of the powered carts. And yelling REALLY loud. And in the way.
Quote from: tbone0106 on December 12, 2010, 06:56:39 PM
I don't know about that. They have an alarming tendency to show up at Walmart with about six kids in tow. And riding one of the powered carts. And yelling REALLY loud. And in the way.
T, where do you live?
Ohio, "The Heart Of It All," if you believe the state's tourism flacks. We're close enough (just across the Big Water) that we get to tell West Virginia jokes all we want. ;D
Quote from: tbone0106 on December 13, 2010, 11:27:31 AM
Ohio, "The Heart Of It All," if you believe the state's tourism flacks. We're close enough (just across the Big Water) that we get to tell West Virginia jokes all we want. ;D
At least you can tell them, here in Ca, it's considered hate speech.
Oh wait, you can only insult White people in CA.
Liberal guilt and all that rot. ;D
Quote from: Solar on December 13, 2010, 12:18:06 PM
At least you can tell them, here in Ca, it's considered hate speech.
Oh wait, you can only insult White people in CA.
Liberal guilt and all that rot. ;D
Go ahead, feel free! It's not hate speech, even in Calipornia, because they're white. We also tell jokes about (white) Kentuckians. Indiana and Michigan and Pennsylvania generally get off light. It's more fun to abuse the hillbillies. :D
[Say, didja hear about the race riot down in Cincinnati? The Kentuckians were throwing sticks of dynamite across the river. The blacks were lighting the fuses and throwing 'em back.]
Quote from: tbone0106 on December 15, 2010, 02:54:52 PM
Go ahead, feel free! It's not hate speech, even in Calipornia, because they're white. We also tell jokes about (white) Kentuckians. Indiana and Michigan and Pennsylvania generally get off light. It's more fun to abuse the hillbillies. :D
[Say, didja hear about the race riot down in Cincinnati? The Kentuckians were throwing sticks of dynamite across the river. The blacks were lighting the fuses and throwing 'em back.]
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
Update:
NOVEMBER 16--The West Virginia woman who last month pulled a knife on two men and announced, "Somebody is going to eat my pussy or I'm going to cut your fucking throat," pleaded guilty today to assault and was sentenced to 90 days in jail.
During an appearance this morning in Jackson County Magistrate Court, Melissa Lee Williams, 41, also received a 90-day suspended sentence and was ordered to pay $185.80 in court costs, according to a plea form. Williams, pictured in the mug shot at left, is currently in custody at the South Central Regional Jail.
Where'd they steal the matches?
:o After seeing her picture I'd definitely need to call a friend. :P
This is why it is a good idea to always leave the bar before last call....
Quote from: K412 on January 02, 2011, 05:57:54 PM
:o After seeing her picture I'd definitely need to call a friend. :P
Friend? I'd send her my enemy, I'd Never send a friend to meet that crazy skank. ;D
I don't doubt this all happened, or that the deputy had immense fun writing this report. I just wonder how much of it got into the local newspaper, versus a copy of the report "leaked through channels" to electronic media. I was a police reporter who (even armed with a copy of the report) would not have gotten this piece into print, 30 years ago. City papers today, maybe, but not in a small paper. That hasn't changed. Police reports get sanitized for anything THAT outrageous.
You make a good point, but I don't think this ever made the paper, it's only the Smoking Gun that got a hold of it.
I've written some pretty funny police reports in my time, and all in an effort to sway the judge one way or the other.
I don't think this one was though, it seems pretty straight forward.
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That's funny! They got her for "brandishing a deadly weapon," and she had a knife too! :P :P :P :P
Quote from: tbone0106 on January 03, 2011, 07:19:33 AM
That's funny! They got her for "brandishing a deadly weapon," and she had a knife too! :P :P :P :P
One has to wonder if the reporting officer was referring to the knife or the pussy as the offensive weapon? ::)