The New Version Of The Old Story Of The Ant And The Grasshopper


TRADITIONAL VERSION:

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself!


MODERN VERSION:

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving.

CBS, NBC, PBS, CNN, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food. America is stunned by the sharp contrast.

How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?

Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody cries when they sing, "It's Not Easy Being Green." Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where the news stations film the group singing, "We shall overcome." Jesse then has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake.

Nancy Pelosi, John Kerry & Harry Reid exclaim in an interview with Larry King that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and all three call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share.

Finally, the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) drafts the "Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper Act" retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government.

Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel of federal judges that Bill Clinton appointed from a list of single-parent welfare recipients. The ant loses the case.

The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he doesn't maintain it.

The ant has disappeared in the snow. The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once peaceful neighborhood.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Be careful how you vote in 2008.

Good stuff, Flyer! I especially like your Bill of Non-Rights.

I was reading an article just this morning that pointed out that in the US, if you do just three things: (1) graduate from high school, (2) get a full-time job, and (3) get married BEFORE you produce children, your chances of ever living in poverty drop from 12% to 2%.

Thanks tbone.  I didn't know that the "grasshopper" thing showed up on this, but it also applies.  I guess I cut and pasted more than I had planned.  Found some "old" stuff on one of my old backup discs, and wanted to share.   ;D

I had to bump this back to the "first page", because I believe it's right on-target. 

Once something hits the 2nd or 3rd page, it's pretty much gone forever.

Where is the author, who wrote it?
When you post this stuff, you are seriously jeopardizing the forum.
Find the author, or it will be deleted.

The Ant and the Grasshopper doesn't matter, seeing how it is old and has been rewritten and posted a billion times.

I have received this many times in emails.  Thought I would put out there who actually wrote it... 8) 8)

a Georgia state representative from Marietta, is not the originator of the piece. The famed "Bill of No Rights" was written in 1993 by Lewis Napper, a self-described amateur philosopher and from Mississippi who ran for a U.S. Senate seat in 2000 as a Libertarian.

Kaye's name likely became associated with it through the innocent act of finding the article in his inbox and liking it enough to forward to friends. People tend to leave official-looking signatures intact when they forward e-mail, and his name's remaining with the piece beyond the initial round of forwardings could easily have created the impression that he was the article's creator.

Kaye is quick to give credit where credit is due, and his office routinely informs those who ask about the "Bill of No Rights" of its true authorship.

On 19 July 2000, advice columnist Ann Landers published a truncated version of the piece, attributing it to Kaye. (Left out were the points about free health care and sending troops to fight in foreign wars.) She praised his "tough 'do-it-yourself' position" and declared the language he used to convey his message "delicious."

The "Bill" resonates with folks because it addresses a number of issues that have often led many of us to shake our heads in disbelief. This Bill of Rights parody strikes straight at the heart of the sense of entitlement so often displayed by those who feel the world owes them a living.

Barbara "the living end" Mikkelson
http://www.snopes.com/language/document/norights.htm

Quote from: Solars Toy on December 19, 2010, 08:29:28 AM
I have received this many times in emails.  Thought I would put out there who actually wrote it... 8) 8)

a Georgia state representative from Marietta, is not the originator of the piece. The famed "Bill of No Rights" was written in 1993 by Lewis Napper, a self-described amateur philosopher and from Mississippi who ran for a U.S. Senate seat in 2000 as a Libertarian.

Kaye's name likely became associated with it through the innocent act of finding the article in his inbox and liking it enough to forward to friends. People tend to leave official-looking signatures intact when they forward e-mail, and his name's remaining with the piece beyond the initial round of forwardings could easily have created the impression that he was the article's creator.

Kaye is quick to give credit where credit is due, and his office routinely informs those who ask about the "Bill of No Rights" of its true authorship.

On 19 July 2000, advice columnist Ann Landers published a truncated version of the piece, attributing it to Kaye. (Left out were the points about free health care and sending troops to fight in foreign wars.) She praised his "tough 'do-it-yourself' position" and declared the language he used to convey his message "delicious."

The "Bill" resonates with folks because it addresses a number of issues that have often led many of us to shake our heads in disbelief. This Bill of Rights parody strikes straight at the heart of the sense of entitlement so often displayed by those who feel the world owes them a living.

Barbara "the living end" Mikkelson
http://www.snopes.com/language/document/norights.htm

Thanks for clearing up who was the originator of the "Bill Of Non-Rights", ST.  I found it in my "archives" and posted it in here, but I had no idea where I got it from.  Probably an e-mail, like you said.  Too bad you resorted to using "Snopes" as your source.  Snopes is not exactly the ultimate "arbiter of the truth", but the explanation of where it came from sounds plausible to me.

Solar, calm down.  I wasn't trying to jeopardize this forum.  So how come it's been deleted?  The "Bill Of Non-Rights" needs to see the light of day again, without everybody having to go to the link. 

Quote from: AmericanFlyer on December 19, 2010, 09:13:20 AM
Thanks for clearing up who was the originator of the "Bill Of Non-Rights", ST.  I found it in my "archives" and posted it in here, but I had no idea where I got it from.  Probably an e-mail, like you said.  Too bad you resorted to using "Snopes" as your source.  Snopes is not exactly the ultimate "arbiter of the truth", but the explanation of where it came from sounds plausible to me.

Solar, calm down.  I wasn't trying to jeopardize this forum. So how come it's been deleted?  The "Bill Of Non-Rights" needs to see the light of day again, without everybody having to go to the link.

I know your not trying to jeopardize anything.  Bottom line is "we" own the forum therefore "we" could be sued for plagiarism not our posters.  Ultimately we are responsible for what is posted here which is why we have mods and admin. 

May not seem like that big of a deal to some but I would shut this site down before I would let it get to that.

Quote from: AmericanFlyer on December 19, 2010, 09:13:20 AM
Thanks for clearing up who was the originator of the "Bill Of Non-Rights", ST.  I found it in my "archives" and posted it in here, but I had no idea where I got it from.  Probably an e-mail, like you said.  Too bad you resorted to using "Snopes" as your source.  Snopes is not exactly the ultimate "arbiter of the truth", but the explanation of where it came from sounds plausible to me.

Solar, calm down.  I wasn't trying to jeopardize this forum.  So how come it's been deleted?  The "Bill Of Non-Rights" needs to see the light of day again, without everybody having to go to the link.

Of course you're not out to hurt us, but what you posted is essentially plagiarism.
You posted it as your own when you neglected credit to the author. 
As the one paying for the site, I am responsible for it's content.

Anytime I see a post without citation as to it's origin, it will be deleted immediately.

Quote from: Solars Toy on December 19, 2010, 12:11:39 PM
I know your not trying to jeopardize anything.  Bottom line is "we" own the forum therefore "we" could be sued for plagiarism not our posters.  Ultimately we are responsible for what is posted here which is why we have mods and admin. 

May not seem like that big of a deal to some but I would shut this site down before I would let it get to that.

It is like survival you talk about all the time.  You error on the safe side, if not you could be dead from just one posting.   Lawyers are out there looking for fresh meat on the net.   :o

Quote from: walkstall on December 19, 2010, 01:11:52 PM

It is like survival you talk about all the time.  You error on the safe side, if not you could be dead from just one posting.   Lawyers are out there looking for fresh meat on the net.   :o

Yes - there are "ambulance chasers" out there too.  Just waiting to take advantage of unsuspecting people.... :o :o

Quote from: Solar on December 19, 2010, 01:10:13 PM
Of course you're not out to hurt us, but what you posted is essentially plagiarism.
You posted it as your own when you neglected credit to the author. 

I posted "The Bill Of Non-Rights" as my own?  Really?  How did you arrive at that conclusion?  Because I didn't provide a link? 

Don't ever accuse me of plagiarism.  Plagiarism is for people who are lazy, dishonest, and unintelligent.  I am none of those things.   

Quote from: AmericanFlyer on December 19, 2010, 05:16:11 PM
I posted "The Bill Of Non-Rights" as my own?  Really?  How did you arrive at that conclusion?  Because I didn't provide a link? 

Don't ever accuse me of plagiarism.  Plagiarism is for people who are lazy, dishonest, and unintelligent.  I am none of those things.

Yes!!! you did plagiarize when you didn't credit the author, I know that was not your intention, but it is nonetheless what occurred.

Dictionary reference.
Plagiarize: Take without referencing from someone else's writing or speech; of intellectual property.

When Tbone said he liked your Bill of Rights, by not stating you were not the author, you essentially claimed it as your own.
That is the text book version of plagiarism.

Read the sticky at the top for clarification, this is not being aimed at you, but for everyone that posts on this forum, including me.

Quote from: AmericanFlyer on December 19, 2010, 05:16:11 PM
I posted "The Bill Of Non-Rights" as my own?  Really?  How did you arrive at that conclusion?  Because I didn't provide a link? 

Don't ever accuse me of plagiarism.  Plagiarism is for people who are lazy, dishonest, and unintelligent.  I am none of those things.

AF, he isn't calling you a plagiarist...  You are indeed a highly intelligent person, and seem very honest and ethical.  Just help keep us out of the court system so the don't "Palin" us...

Quote from: Solar on December 19, 2010, 05:32:31 PM
Yes!!! you did plagiarize when you didn't credit the author, I know that was not your intention, but it is nonetheless what occurred.

Dictionary reference.
Plagiarize: Take without referencing from someone else's writing or speech; of intellectual property.

When Tbone said he liked your Bill of Rights, by not stating you were not the author, you essentially claimed it as your own.
That is the text book version of plagiarism.

Read the sticky at the top for clarification, this is not being aimed at you, but for everyone that posts on this forum, including me.

Plagiarism requires INTENT.  I never intentionally claimed that I was the author of the "Bill Of Non-Rights".  If I was the author, I would have said so. 

Solar, you are going to lose members if you crank up your "lawyer paranoia" machine any higher.