You can't really make this stuff up, so I'll just toss you a clip. The article is from the New York Times (sorry) and the bold is mine.
QuoteDENVER — Does a river — or a plant, or a forest — have rights?
This is the essential question in what attorneys are calling a first-of-its-kind federal lawsuit, in which a Denver lawyer and a far-left environmental group are asking a judge to recognize the Colorado River as a person.
If successful, it could upend environmental law, possibly allowing the redwood forests, the Rocky Mountains or the deserts of Nevada to sue individuals, corporations and governments over resource pollution or depletion. Future lawsuits in its mold might seek to block pipelines, golf courses or housing developments and force everyone from agriculture executives to mayors to rethink how they treat the environment.
You can read the whole mess here..... https://www.nytimes.com/2017/09/26/us/does-the-colorado-river-have-rights-a-lawsuit-seeks-to-declare-it-a-person.html?smid=tw-nytimes&smtyp=cur
WHAT?!?!?
You mean all those years of camping in the woods, canoeing down river after river in Wisconsin, and across multiple lakes in the Boundary Waters Canoe area... I've been crapping and pissing on this Idiot's relation?
There I am, hanging over a fallen log, laying a couple of my own, stinkin' up the place, scaring away the bears, rabbits & squirrels - who would've thunk it!
And pissing against all those trees! I thought I was fertilizing them - never meant to dishonor them.
What kind of Moron thinks this stuff up!?
Quote from: Hoofer on September 26, 2017, 04:37:56 PM
WHAT?!?!?
You mean all those years of camping in the woods, canoeing down river after river in Wisconsin, and across multiple lakes in the Boundary Waters Canoe area... I've been crapping and pissing on this Idiot's relation?
There I am, hanging over a fallen log, laying a couple of my own, stinkin' up the place, scaring away the bears, rabbits & squirrels - who would've thunk it!
And pissing against all those trees! I thought I was fertilizing them - never meant to dishonor them.
What kind of Moron thinks this stuff up!?
What blows my mind is that these are REAL people doing this shit. These are REAL attorneys appearing in REAL courtrooms spending REAL money doing this shit. I look down on the NYT, but this reads like something out of MAD Magazine.
But what pronoun do you use? It's already illegal to use the wrong pronoun when addressing a snowflake in California. What happens if you refer to a redwood as David when it is in fact Davina? How can you tell the sex of a river?
Quote from: The Boo Man... on September 26, 2017, 06:59:05 PM
But what pronoun do you use? It's already illegal to use the wrong pronoun when addressing a snowflake in California. What happens if you refer to a redwood as David when it is in fact Davina? How can you tell the sex of a river?
If you get wet up stream it's a man. If you get wet down stream it a woman.
How do you know it a river is a pervert?
Quote from: walkstall on September 26, 2017, 07:07:47 PM
If you get wet up stream it's a man. If you get wet down stream it a woman.
How do you know it a river is a pervert?
Was Carlos Danger swimming in it?
Quote from: The Boo Man... on September 26, 2017, 09:00:01 PM
That's exactly what he said at sentencing.
I am sure it's more like, but I am special. I should get home monitoring.
Quote from: walkstall on September 26, 2017, 07:07:47 PM
If you get wet up stream it's a man. If you get wet down stream it a woman.
How do you know it a river is a pervert?
If you have sex in a river.... is that a 3-way, or considered rape? :scared:
Quote from: Hoofer on September 27, 2017, 04:42:05 AM
If you have sex in a river.... is that a 3-way, or considered rape? :scared:
I guess it depends on whether you had the river's consent. In writing. in advance, and in front of witnesses.
Maybe it's time for me to have a serious talk with good ol' Lake Vesuvius.....
Quote from: TboneAgain on September 26, 2017, 05:00:42 PM
What blows my mind is that these are REAL people doing this shit. These are REAL attorneys appearing in REAL courtrooms spending REAL money doing this shit. I look down on the NYT, but this reads like something out of MAD Magazine.
What is a "REAL attorney"?
Quote from: supsalemgr on September 27, 2017, 08:57:53 AM
What is a "REAL attorney"?
I meant to contrast the REAL world to, for instance, MAD Magazine or perhaps The Onion, worlds where everything is not real. I meant to convey the unreality attached to the concept of actual people with actual jobs and careers and educations and degrees and licenses to practice law pursuing a lawsuit that literally claims that a river should be considered a person under the law, a position so utterly detached from reality.
How'd I do?
Quote from: TboneAgain on September 27, 2017, 09:16:00 AM
I meant to contrast the REAL world to, for instance, MAD Magazine or perhaps The Onion, worlds where everything is not real. I meant to convey the unreality attached to the concept of actual people with actual jobs and careers and educations and degrees and licenses to practice law pursuing a lawsuit that literally claims that a river should be considered a person under the law, a position so utterly detached from reality.
How'd I do?
The question was somewhat tongue in cheek. Lawyers will sue about anything if they see a potential fee.
Quote from: supsalemgr on September 27, 2017, 09:53:26 AM
The question was somewhat tongue in cheek. Lawyers will sue about anything if they see a potential fee.
To paraphrase my late father, if he was addressing his lawyer son at the dinner table, he'd point out, "Boy, the only thing that'd turn your stomach is if I shoved a dollar bill up your ass. Your stomach'd turn to get it."
Well, they call the Mississippi Ol' Man River.
Quote from: PeterR on October 02, 2017, 01:08:20 PM
Well, they call the Mississippi Ol' Man River.
:lol: :lol:
That's misogynistic!
Quote from: The Boo Man... on October 02, 2017, 06:50:41 PM
:lol: :lol:
That's misogynistic!
Take that up with Jerome Kern.
BYW, I like your picture. Reminds me of me as a kid.
Quote from: PeterR on October 02, 2017, 09:07:19 PM
Take that up with Jerome Kern.
BYW, I like your picture. Reminds me of me as a kid.
I guess you're not lactose intolerant.