World Famous Economists Speak Out About God, Heaven and Hell...

Started by actionblock, January 10, 2014, 07:48:14 PM

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actionblock

God is omniscient...He knows all things past, present and future. What is hidden from human sight is still known by God. Therefore, by definition, God is an Economist...The Chief Economist.

The Chief Economist exists in a non-physical dimension called "BigTime". "BigTime" is a huge dimension, a really huge dimension, it is infinite, meaning that it has no end, it just goes on and on. The Chief Economist created and plopped (about 6,000 +/- years ago) Adam and Eve into a three dimensional space that we call the earth which exists in a bigger space that we call the universe or cosmos which exists in the Chief Economist's infinite dimension of "BigTime". Among the progeny of Adam and Eve are Economists...Lots and lots of them.

Economists are God's favorite children and are created in the image of God and are kindred spirits with Him...very much more so than regular folks. Even though God gave economists above average perception and intelligence, he also gave them free will, which due to environmental factors may have caused some to stray from the path of righteouness. Nonetheless, I decided to query some of them and shot off email's asking "Is there a God or Heaven or Hell?" Here are some of their responses:

Jason Furman - "There is a hell and I'm in it. Don't know how the fuck I got here because I don't recall ever being in the real world and doing anything to deserve this."

Ben Bernanke - "Achieving price stability is not only important in itself, it is also central to attaining the Federal Reserve's other mandate objectives of maximum sustainable employment and moderate long-term interest rates."

José Manuel Barroso - "There is no God without Heaven and Hell."

Alberto Alesina - "I pray there is no God."

Gabriel Marie Saldana - "God, vampires and werewolfs do not exist, but I'm not too sure about the last two."

Janet Yellen - "The truth is, if you spent an evening at our house you would probably hear God, Heaven and Hell discussed over the dinner table. My husband, Nobel prize-winning economist George Akerlof and I work together, we're both economists, and the bulk of our friends are economists. You would eat a diet that is richer in discussions of God, Heaven and Hell than many people would find appetizing."

George Akerlof - "Did my wife answer yet? If she did, I concur. If she didn't answer yet and does in the future, I concur. If she doesn't answer I have no comment. Don't want to embarrass her, you know."

Yuri Maltsev - "God and socialism are synonymous with public slavery, except that God does not exist."

James Heckman - "Overall, I think God is a bad idea."

Timothy Geithner - "Of course there is a God and I'm doing his work. Have been for years."

Alan Greenspan - " I believe in God in general, especially in a larger context which encompasses the institutions of Heaven and Hell but with an underlying structure in which many of the inherent risks are dramatically and fully hedged."

Afterlife Communications
Enough of the living. I decided to go over to the Fashion Island mall and visit the "Tarot Card Reading and Séance Parlor" and see if I could make contact with some economists that had arrived at their final destination and had settled in for eternity. I called two of my girlfriends and asked if they would care to join me at the mall, do a séance and follow up with lunch, some shopping and perhaps a movie, preferably "Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug" in 3D. We all rolled to the mall.
"Everything must have a purpose?" asked God. "Certainly," said man. "Then I leave it to you to think of one for all this," said God. And He went away.
-- Kurt Vonnegut, Cat's Cradle --

walkstall

If this is not your work then do not quote it without the arathers ok.  It is called plagiarism. 
A politician thinks of the next election. A statesman, of the next generation.- James Freeman Clarke

Always remember "Feelings Aren't Facts."

Solar

Yes there is a God, as well as Hell, It's where Keynesians go. :wink:
Official Trump Cult Member

#WWG1WGA

Q PATRIOT!!!

JustKari

Just checking in Walks, thanks for the notice.  :biggrin:  Actionblock, do you have a point and if you did take this from somewhere else please get Solar, taxed,or Walkstall a link to the original content so that credit can be given where it is due?

walkstall

Quote from: JustKari on January 11, 2014, 06:28:05 AM
Just checking in Walks, thanks for the notice.  :biggrin:  Actionblock, do you have a point and if you did take this from somewhere else please get Solar, taxed,or Walkstall a link to the original content so that credit can be given where it is due?

The young lady said this was her original work.
A politician thinks of the next election. A statesman, of the next generation.- James Freeman Clarke

Always remember "Feelings Aren't Facts."