Joe Biden has a heart attack and dies. He goes to Hell where the Devil is waiting for him. "I don't know what to do," says the Devil. "You're on my list but I have no room for you. But you definitely have to stay here, so I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I've got three people here who weren't quite as bad as you. I'll let one of them go, but you have to take their place. I'll even let YOU decide who leaves." Biden thought that sounded pretty good so he agreed.

The devil opened the first room. In it was Richard Nixon and a large pool of water. He kept diving in and surfacing empty handed over and over and over, such was his fate in Hell. "No!" Biden said. "I don't think so! I'm not a good swimmer and I don't think I could do that all day long."

The Devil led him to the next room. In it was Nancy Pelosi with a sledgehammer and a room full of rocks. All she did was swing that hammer, time after time after time. "No! I've got this problem with my shoulder. I would be in constant agony if all I could do was break rocks all day!" commented Biden.

The Devil opened a third door. In it, Biden saw Bill Clinton lying naked on the floor with his arms staked over his head and his legs staked in spread-eagle pose. Bent over him was Monica Lewinsky, doing what she does best. Biden looked at this in disbelief for a while and finally said, "Yeah..... I can handle this." The Devil smiled and said, "Monica, you're free to go!"

 

 

 

 

It's a good thing I am reading this at night not in the A.M. when I am having my coffee.   

 

Reminds me of the guy that walked into the bar an ordered five shots of tequila.

As he's pouring the shots the bartender says You must be celebrating what's the occasion?

Guy says I just got my first blowjob.

Bartender says congratulations let me pour you one on the house

After he emptied the last of the five shots and set the glass on the bar he says don't bother that should get the taste out of my mouth