Arguing with God...

Started by tbone0106, December 15, 2010, 10:26:22 PM

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tbone0106

A young man with practical inclinations died unexpectedly when a blown tire directed his car toward a bridge abutment.

St. Peter met him at the Pearly Gates, but offered no comfort. Consulting his official list, he declared, "Nope. Your name's not here. You must be headed... DOWN." The young man left with a smile and a wave.

On his arrival in Hell, the young man immediately generated attention, and the Devil put him to work fixing the place up. Before long, Hell had air conditioning and cable TV and networked computers.

The Devil and God were talking on  one of the new telephones one day, and God asked, "Satan, you son of a bitch, how the hell are things going down there?"

The devil replied, "Better than you might think, Big Guy! We've made a lot of improvements here lately. I've got high-speed internet and streaming video! We got this new guy in a while back who's pretty good at fixing stuff up."

"Oh yeah," God said. "My man at the gates made a mistake the other day and sent you a fellow that belongs up here. That's probably him."

"Well, I'm not going to give him up," the Devil said. "He's doing good work here and I want him on my staff."

"I don't care what you want!" God thundered. "You'll send him up here where he belongs, or I'll sue!"

Beelzebub dissolved in laughter. "Ha ha ho hee hee... Where are YOU gonna find a lawyer?"