Why Engineers Don't Write Recipe Books

Started by walkstall, March 07, 2011, 09:35:31 AM

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walkstall

Chocolate Chip Cookies:

Ingredients:

1. 532.35 cm3 gluten
2. 4.9 cm3 NaHCO3
3. 4.9 cm3 refined halite
4. 236.6 cm3 partially hydrogenated tallow triglyceride
5. 177.45 cm3 crystalline C12H22O11
6. 177.45 cm3 unrefined C12H22O11
7. 4.9 cm3 methyl ether of protocatechuic aldehyde
8. Two calcium carbonate-encapsulated avian albumen-coated protein
9. 473.2 cm3 theobroma cacao
10. 236.6 cm3 de-encapsulated legume meats (sieve size #10)

To a 2-L jacketed round reactor vessel (reactor #1) with an overall heat transfer coefficient of about 100 Btu/F-ft2-hr, add ingredients one, two and three with constant agitation. In a second 2-L reactor vessel with a radial flow impeller operating at 100 rpm, add ingredients four, five, six, and seven until the mixture is homogenous. To reactor #2, add ingredient eight, followed by three equal volumes of the homogenous mixture in reactor #1. Additionally, add ingredient nine and ten slowly, with constant agitation. Care must be taken at this point in the reaction to control any temperature rise that may be the result of an exothermic reaction.

Using a screw extrude attached to a #4 nodulizer, place the mixture piece-meal on sheet (300 x 600 mm). Heat in a 460K oven for a period of time that is in agreement with Frank & Johnston's first order rate expression (see JACOS, 21, 55), or until golden brown. Once the reaction is complete, place the sheet on a 25C heat-transfer table, allowing the product to come to equilibrium.
A politician thinks of the next election. A statesman, of the next generation.- James Freeman Clarke

Always remember "Feelings Aren't Facts."

U_Kay

 :))  Funny, but I almost got a headache. It reminded me of an engineer I know. Good guy, but he's always too technical.


walkstall

Quote from: U_Kay on March 07, 2011, 11:47:02 AM
:))  Funny, but I almost got a headache. It reminded me of an engineer I know. Good guy, but he's always too technical.

My son works with engineer, but he talks people talk around us. lol
A politician thinks of the next election. A statesman, of the next generation.- James Freeman Clarke

Always remember "Feelings Aren't Facts."

tbone0106

If this recipe gives you a headache, how do you cope with traditional recipes? Tsp, tbsp, oz., cup, pinch, dash, twist. Mix, fold, blend, combine, stir in, add. Bake, boil, broil, roast, broast, broil, sear, singe, fry, saute, brown, poach, parboil, steam, and plain ol' cook. Cut, slice, chip, chop, chip-chop, chunk, trim, carve, grate, halve, quarter, peel, pare, core, seed, pit, skin, pluck.

And the list goes on....  :o :-\

Solar

Quote from: tbone0106 on March 08, 2011, 09:36:12 PM
If this recipe gives you a headache, how do you cope with traditional recipes? Tsp, tbsp, oz., cup, pinch, dash, twist. Mix, fold, blend, combine, stir in, add. Bake, boil, broil, roast, broast, broil, sear, singe, fry, saute, brown, poach, parboil, steam, and plain ol' cook. Cut, slice, chip, chop, chip-chop, chunk, trim, carve, grate, halve, quarter, peel, pare, core, seed, pit, skin, pluck.

And the list goes on....  :o :-\
Well played T, I remember the first time I cracked a cook book open, I was lost, but then, I think like an engineer, in exacting things, not measuring in by a pinch or a zest.

But now that I've been cooking for more than four decades, I don't need a cook book, if it tastes bad going in, it won't get any better coming out.
So just keep spicing it up, till it ain't so bad anymore. :D
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ISmokePowderedTrout

Quote from: walkstall on March 07, 2011, 09:35:31 AM

5. 177.45 cm3 crystalline C12H22O11
6. 177.45 cm3 unrefined C12H22O11


A real engineer would have called for a larger quantity of refined sugar and then specified the optimal rate of molasses supplementation.

Shanghai Dan

Quote from: walkstall on March 07, 2011, 09:35:31 AM
Chocolate Chip Cookies:

Ingredients:
8. Two calcium carbonate-encapsulated avian albumen-coated protein
I believe there is an error in quantity specification for ingredient number 8; I'll generate an ECO so we can review and revise the documentation, and get it on to the production floor.
Life has proven to be 100% terminal...

Solars Toy

Quote from: Shanghai Dan on May 27, 2011, 09:09:21 AM
I believe there is an error in quantity specification for ingredient number 8; I'll generate an ECO so we can review and revise the documentation, and get it on to the production floor.

Uhhh ok....
I pray, not wish because I have a God not a Genie.

Solar

Quote from: Solars Toy on May 27, 2011, 07:34:16 PM
Uhhh ok....
I no whutcher thunkin, yer thunken thayse needen mar choklet.
Aincha? :D
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Solars Toy

Quote from: GreyRaceGlobalist on May 27, 2011, 07:01:49 AM
A real engineer would have called for a larger quantity of refined sugar and then specified the optimal rate of molasses supplementation.
Quote from: GreyRaceGlobalist on May 27, 2011, 07:01:49 AM
A real engineer would have called for a larger quantity of refined sugar and then specified the optimal rate of molasses supplementation.

Ok this one I get....brown sugar. 
I pray, not wish because I have a God not a Genie.

Shanghai Dan

Quote from: Solars Toy on May 27, 2011, 07:34:16 PM
Uhhh ok....
:))

Ingredient 8 simply specified "two ... protein", but did not specify the actual weight or volume of said protein enclosures.  Nor did it specify the manufacturing source.  Are we talking items from a hummingbird, or from a duck, or from an ostrich?  All would qualify as avian protein packages yet the resulting assembly would be radically different!

As-is, I do not believe engineering has provided adequate documentation.  Purchasing does not have sufficient information to acquire a reliable protein source, and the lack of specificity in the specification does not allow incoming inspection and QC to properly qualify what may be purchased.  So the production line will halt since we will be missing a key component required by the production team.

Oh, and ECO = Engineering Change Order.

Shanghai Dan
An actual engineer - degreed and everything!
Life has proven to be 100% terminal...

Solar

Typical engineer, not once have you checked with the testing lab to see if you even came close to getting it right.
But keep sending over the ,mistakes, were perfecting the formula, utilizing the smile rating.
More chocolate eggs, now!!!


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tbone0106

Hey, just slap a blob of it on the floor and see if the dog likes it. If he turns up his nose, give it up.

Solar

Quote from: tbone0106 on June 04, 2011, 08:17:38 AM
Hey, just slap a blob of it on the floor and see if the dog likes it. If he turns up his nose, give it up.
You haven't met one of my dogs, she will eat anything.
All I have to do is act like I like it, and she will swallow it whole.
From peppers to raw vegetables, that dog inhales it all.

I've seen her eat till she can't hold anymore, then puke it up, wait 2 minutes and clean it up.
Rather disgusting if you ask me. :o
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Shanghai Dan

Quote from: Solar on May 28, 2011, 06:57:26 AM
Typical engineer, not once have you checked with the testing lab to see if you even came close to getting it right.
LOL!

Hey, I'll send it right over for testing, but first I need a project number to bill against, and we'll need to know from the original PM and spec what would be the typical parameters of product so we can get the engineering lab to build up samples!

I do this too much... :-[
Life has proven to be 100% terminal...